The Tale of Billy and Mandy

I went to the Knight's Templar after work to meet up with John Hall, Billy Bracegirdle and Sylvester. John Hall's mum was in hospital and he was feeling a bit down so I said i'd go and have a few drinks with him. I had spoken to Billy around lunchtime and he told me he had changed his mind and was going home after work, but when I got to the pub I found him sitting there on his own with two pints. I told him i'd be back in a minute and went to meet John Hall outside Carey Street. He was not there so i went into the high court, down to the main entrance and asked Peter Vale on the front if he had seen John, and it turned out i just missed him. I ran around the building and cut up bell yard and caught up with him and then we joined Will in the pub.

Sylvester came down about 10 minutes afterwards. It was good to see him. John had planned to take Sylvester to the Griffin (A strip joint) for the first time. Yvonne (Billy's Ex) came in and Billy had to move seats so she would not be in his eyeline. They broke up about four months ago and i know that Billy is still quite hurt. He explained that he just didn't want to see any guys talking to Yvonne because he might lose his temper. I suppose that's understandable but I did explain to him that Yvonne has more respect for him than that. I was still undecided as to what I would do afterwards. John invited me along to the Griffin with him and Sylvester, but i declined the invitation as it's not really my kind of thing. (Don't get me wrong, i have nothing against looking at naked women, but i don't like the sleazy connotation or the clientele who frequent the griffin.) I was hoping to go to the 12 bar club for LJ's gig but Will pulled out during the week and i didn't like the idea of going on my own. I had been speaking to my friend Amanda and suggested going for a drink with her, which she seemed up for. I told her I would meet her at Camden tube at 8. I was working on Billy to get him to come with us. John suggested going to the Penderel's Oak for a quick one as it was on the way to both Holborn tube and the Griffin. I recited the story of how we went there last week and they would not serve Robert, and how I was boycotting the place, but I'm ashamed to say that 10 minutes later I was in the Penderel's Oak. :-(

We only stayed for one because John didn't like the new layout. He said it was too "clubby". So we left the old perverts to the Griffin and Billy decided to tag along with me and come to meet Amanda. I was dreading the two of them meeting particularly if Billy was a lot more drunk than he let on and would be misbehaving. (Billy in a nutshell: He's got a heart of gold but he's a very pessimistic person a bit like I used to be. He appears to always be depressed but I get the impression that he is either just seeking attention or basically enjoys feeling like that. When he gets drunk he becomes a bit hyper like that tourettes guy who won big brother, but without the swearing.) But it actually went really well!! I haven't seen Amanda for ages - I started speaking to her online and we decided to go for a mexican. That was four years ago. We speak online often but haven't seen each other since. Just recently I get the impression that she was a bit down as she had a lot of things going on especially a bit of bloke trouble and the fact that she had realised that she was different from her peers. So I suggested giving her a change of scenery and that she should come out with us. However, Billy was not the introduction I had in mind.

It actually went okay. Billy was behaving himself and started to liven up a bit. When we got to Quinns I got a round in and went back to join this unlikely threesome. They were already chatting away. They seemed to get on like a house on fire! They compared IPods and discovered they had very similar tastes in music. Mandy's collection featured all the "modern" bands that everyone is listening to but i can't stand (Franz Ferdinand, The Killers, Kaiser Chiefs, etc) and Billy's was more or less the same but more geared towards my tastes. (My Chemical Romance, Fall Out Boy and even a bit of Killswitch Engage.) However, they found a lot of similarities. At some points in the evening they had forgotten I was even there and I had to resort to watching "Britain's Got Talent" on the telly and seeing the unbelievably charming and extremely talented Bessie Curzons get through to the final. I couldn't get a word in edgeways!!

We then went to the Elephant's Head just around the corner. The place had a teddy boy feel to it and was playing all that fifties music that brought to mind images of combs with flick knives in them and guys driving cadillacs on the "Wrong side of the Tracks". There were some Hungarian 50's throwbacks in there with great tattoos. Mandy had to push off as she was getting up for work early the next day, and her mum came and picked her up. I walked her to the car then went back to join Billy and have one for the road. He started to get a little down from this point onwards, and became paranoid because he thought we were in a gay pub. (He needs to work on these insecurities, they will be his downfall). I assured him that if it was a gay pub i didn't know, and then ushered him in the direction of the tube, stopping to get a delicious steak sandwich on the way, and then caught the last train home.

This morning I was woken up by bible bashers. The dicks. They tried to give me a leaflet with a picture of a girl stroking a lion on the front. There was something wrong about the whole thing. I asked why doesn't god get rid of all the chavs. They didn't know. They then tried to talk to me about jesus but I threatened them with a slap and they left. I have just recieved the following text from Billy:

"I no i sound like im a wanker but when ya see amanda next can ya ask if i can have her number. Even as mates. Thanx for tonite my friend."

I wonder...