Big Brother is Watching...and so am I!

I absolutely played my socks off at football tonight. One of the best games I have ever played if i do say so myself. I scored the first goal of the match, then went on to score three more including one that left Kev and Les looking like a right pair of lemons.

I have not been up to much since my last blog post; been settling into my new job and stuff. I get paid tomorrow so i plan a big weekend of drinking, shopping in camden and more drinking.

I have started to eat a lot healthier lately. I now eat an apple a day (keeps the medical practitioner out of close proximity, or so i've heard - but then again, is it not good to have a doctor nearby at all times, just in case you suddenly get a hernea when lifting some lever arch files or something?) I have also started to eat sunflower seeds, melons, bananas, and grapes, and drink clementine juice for breakfast and usually have a houmous and falafel wrap for lunch. (Incidentally, the girl who comes around our workplace every lunchtime and sells sandwiches is a bit of alright; she's Slovakian, so I have been on the internet and learned a few phrases ("Kolko to Stoji, nerozumiem po Slovensky"!) in an attempt to try and impress her. She seems the shy type, but i reckon with a bit of work she could maybe start to open up a bit. (As it were.).

Anyway, enough about my lovelife and eating habits - i watched the first show of Big Brother yesterday and was delighted to say I was one step ahead of my mum (who is a big fan of the show) - as I had heard a rumor that it would be an all-female household with just one male housemate. Not that it bothers me particularly - i only ever watch the first show just to see what a cross-section of our society they have decided to put in this year, this bunch of Ancient Greeks who supposedly accurately represent the rest of us. You might think...11 women and one guy - heaven on earth!! But you should see some of them. A couple look like they have fallen out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. I will be perfectly honest. I HATE THE FUCKING SHOW. I have never voted and probably never will; and like I said, i only ever watch the first episode just to see who goes in in the hope that they might actually put someone interesting in there as opposed to the never-ending line of posh-spice wannabees and transsexual posers they usually put in. I think they should put a few goths in, personally; it would keep the other housemates in check.

OK i shouldnt do this but i'm gonna quickly give you my opinions on the housemates. This is the order i put them in in order of preference:

1.) Lesley. Strange choice, I hear you say. But I will try to explain. Although she reminds me of a headmistress, i liked her from the moment I saw her as she just did not care and came across as having no time for idiots. Which I like. Sure to cause rifts in the house and keep the others on thier toes - and she came in right after the twins and it was brilliant to see thier faces when they were expecting some hunky guy to come walking in and instead they got thier worst nightmare! Well done, love!! Good luck to you!
2.) Emily. On paper, she should be number one because she is easily the best looking in the house. And she's got the best taste in music. And she's an intelligent girl. Heck, on paper she's my dream partner. However, i don't think she's a true rock chick. Would a true rock chick spend four grand on her teeth? No, a true rock chick would crack them whilst opening a bottle of beer and replace them with Mick Jagger's kidney stones. Or something.
3.) Carole. Funny, and reminds me of a friend of mine. (Vera). and she's a local girl, so you gotta keep the flag flying for East London!
4.) Shabzam. (Sorry if i spelled the name wrong - the first word that comes to mind is "Spirited". But i do get the impression that she could get annoying after a while.
5.) Tracey. The "Cheesy Quaver". Wierd, zany, funny-looking, but absolutely mental. Bit of a strange one i must admit; i am actually writing this list from bottom to top and was going to start with Tracey at no.10, but as I was writing it i realised how much i hated the other 5 contestants.
6.) Nikki. Did not really get anything from you. Sorry.
7.) Laura. I know she's probably a nice girl, but she reminds me too much of one of my aunts who is a bit of a tart. (Sorry Laura, i know i'm being a bit shallow there. Maybe you'll prove me wrong and i'll grow to love you. But i doubt it.) - Agree with you on the anti-smoking though.
8.) Chanelle. You are not Victoria Beckham. Without the sunglasses you look like the bird from the playstation advert.
9.) The Twins. Irritating bollock suckers. (I used to have a thing for twins but i have been permanently put off.
10.) Charlie. Would you even be on the show if you were not Keiran Richardson's cousin? Nice body, but from the shoulders upwards lets you down big time.

So there you have it. Not that I care that much about Big Brother, but for those of you that do, now you have my very much sought-after viewpoint on the Z-list stars of tomorrow.